Kindness

Today I took my little brother and the family dog on a walk and at one point, we stopped at the park for a while. An Asian family was there, watching their kids play, the two women and elderly man talking amongst themselves. But then they approach me, and are petting the dog, and smiling merrily at me, and even just that makes me feel at home. I felt as if they loved me, and they didn't even know me. They didn't speak much English at all, but even so, I felt like we were able to communicate well. I don't know if I was just feeling really sentimental today or something, but it just made me feel like people are just so amazing. People are great, and although no enormous act of service was done or anything, the pure and simple kindness of strangers was enough. When I left they all wave goodbye at me and embraced me as if I were family or a good friend! I mean, if all foreigners (I mean, not that they're not U.S. citizens, but probably used to live in Asia) are like this, then bring it on. I'm ready to travel the world! Or maybe I'm ready to move. Goodbye, home country, kindness is what I'm after. Wouldn't it be amazing if everybody could just be so utterly compassionate and alive and kind?

Languages I Want To Learn

-Mandarin Chinese
-Japanese
-Arabic
-Armenian
-Dari and/or Pashto
-Persian (Farsi)
-Tamil
-Filipino
-Uzbek
-Afrikaans*
-Swedish
-Frisian
-Danish
-Finnish
-Russian
(see more in similar travel-language-things to do-posts)

Greatest Travels (mostly Asia)

-Japan
-South Korea
-China
-Vietnam
-Singapore
-Philippines
-India
-Indonesia
-Armenia
-Turkey
-Thailand
-Taiwan
-Malaysia
-Pakistan
-U.A.E.
-Bhutan
-Sri Lanka
-Israel
-Maldives
-Mongolia
-Cambodia
-Lebanon
-Tibet
-Georgia
-Yemen

Being Labelled

I don't like labels. But of course, I've been dubbed plenty of things- emo, goth, boring nerd, the like. And the thing about labels is that you dont ever really know what that person's like. And for me, boring is pretty much the only word that ever gets to me. I don't know why, but it hurts me, because I'm not, in any way. And especially when people think that just because I'm smart means I don't have a life....what? No. And I've proved just the opposite. I can be downright hilarious, bad, mischievous, adventurous....and really, smarts is all some people see. But I don't really mind too much. I just wish it wouldn't be so big of a thing. After all, I wouldn't even label myself, because why in the world would I confine myself to a stereotype, a generalization, never to live up to anything else?

Regrets

I don't want to live with regrets. I used to look back on everything I screwed up on all the time. Now, I just live life freely. Nothing to worry about, because I know I messed up and why go back on the past like that? No need at all, love. It's a pointless thing, regret.

A Great Escape-Treasures and Junk

Treasures and Junk has the best and largest selection of antique things that I've ever seen, and it's the perfect getaway from the rest of the world. In fact, today I purchased a few aged photographs. 5/5 ☆☆☆☆☆

Birds Set Free-Dalton Rapattoni

Goodness, I died. Salty Dalty's performance was breathtaking. As always, it made me feel something, tonight especially more than ever with that Sia number. And when he got choked up at the end, I nearly fell of the couch crying. What a joke my life is.

Mental Health: Books: Beautiful

Now, if you're looking for a book that will uplift and edify your soul, I'm warning you, this is not the one for you. In fact, it's rather depressing, especially near the end, with the slightest glimpse of hope. And that's just the way I like it. "Beautiful" by Amy Reed has become one of the staple novels that I keep coming back to. And I assume most other teens out there will be able to relate to the happenings in this book. Cassie, the main character, is in the seventh grade. She's just moved, and is at a new school. However, with new friends comes new experiences, leading into a downward spiral of sex, drugs, violence, abuse, and depression, not to mention all the family issues you could ever possibly need. The way the book was written, I felt truly connected to Cassia and how she was feeling at every moment, the way it feels to be on drugs, detached. It was fascinating for sure. I greedily finished the book within an hour and a half or perhaps two. Although it's not going to have you cured of any mental health issues, by any means, it does give you a taste of a life that could be, once was, is, your own life, or somebody else's that you feel like you know inside and out. The ending is gloomy but gives a teeny bit of hope for Cassie, and I couldn't have been more satisfied. Five stars all around! ☆☆☆☆☆

Confidence: Books:how to be brave

The novel "how to be brave" by E. Katherine Kottaras is a great read for boosting confidence. The main character, Georgia, was told by her late mother to do everything, be brave. And so Georgia makes a list of things to accomplish in her senior year of high school, and she goes from there. It's a great book about a teenager struggling with insecurities and trying to find her confidence. From the first page, I knew I loved it, and the last didn't disappoint either. Overall, a great novel that I will no doubt read time and time again, and will surely buy sometime in the near future. And that is the highest compliment I can give, really. Five stars! ☆☆☆☆☆

I Stopped Taking My Antidepressants

I've been on fluoxetine since October. But then my psychiatrist moved offices and since he can't prescribe me anything more, I've run entirely out of stock of my antidepressants. And now my depression's back in full force. And here I was, thinking I was cured, that I was alright. I feel weak, knowing the only thing keeping me from sadness is a little pill. I now remember how crippling it is. I woke up this morning wanting to stay in bed all day,no interest in eating, wanting to cry at having to do my schoolwork at all. Everything seems to be too much. I cried last week, too, at the slightest thing. And I shook it off as post-period feels...until now, and I connect it with my withdrawal of a month, give or take. Not only did it help with my depression, it completely obliterated my bulimia. After a few weeks on it, I kinda trickled off with my habits, and then it suddenly stopped. No more throwing up. Not even an urge to stick that tricky finger down my throat. Just like that, like a light switch. And I was contemplating it all spring break. Oh, goodness. I'm a mess again. I thought I was alright, and now this. I just want to sit in the dark beneath my sheets forever, just sit there. Be alone. It hurts to know that I can't conquer my demons on my own, that I need medication to wash it away. I don't think I can handle anymore of this without my medication. I'm bursting into tears as I type this, the tears blurring my vision, making all these typed lines blur together. Goodness, I need more medication.....or at least something to take my mind off everything. Some Lush. Something.

Girl Power: Literature: A Girl Called Fearless

"A Girl Called Fearless", a book by Catherine Linka, is about a particular teenage girl trying to get back her own independence and freedom in a dystopian world ruled by men who are oppressing the slowly dwindling female population. It's a great read for anybody looking to feel empowered in themselves, although near the end it starts to get a little dull. However, I loved the fact that it shows a world in the very near future, a place that could be our world soon. It's scary to think that girls could have all basic rights taken away. It really does make you think. 4/5 star rating. ☆☆☆☆

All-Time Favorite Playlist

Marina and the Diamonds
Zella Day
Everybody Wants To Rule The World-Lorde
Faded-ZHU
Pity Party (XVII Remix)-Melanie Martinez
Melanie Martinez
Fetty Wap
5Seconds of Summer
Weeknd
Halsey
Drake
The Way She Feels-Between the Trees
I hate u I love u-Gnash
Fly Away Hero
Dalton Rapattoni
Love Yourself-Justin Bieber
As Long as You Love Me-Justin Bieber
G-Eazy
River Flows in You-Yiruma
Lana Del Rey
Nicki Minaj
Sia

Batman VS. Superman Movie Review

To put it plainly, the Batman vs. Superman movie was disappointing. Trust me, it wasn't bad. It actually was a good way to spend my evening. I was captivated. It's just that there were too many scenes that were confusing, and left me thinking "what the heck is going on??" Some things just didnt make sense, and if you decide to give it a go, you'll see what I mean what it comes to Batman and Superman's rivalry. It didn't live up to the Dark Nights and Justice League movies. It was forced. And, this is just personally, but every time Jessica Eisenberg, AKA Lex Luther, spoke, all I could think of was a giant blue bird, namely Blu, from Rio. I was practically bursting out laughing. It was just a wild night. 60% for this movie. Enjoy

Some Bucket List Items of Interest

-Attend Holi festival in India
-Go to Oktoberfest in Germany
-Ride a camel in Turkey
-Anything in Alaska
-Visit the Lush in England
-Hike in Iceland and Switzerland
-Visit Venice, Italy
-Go see 5SOS perform in Australia
-See all the beautiful architecture of Spain
-The Luvre Museum in France
-Romania and Russia in the winter♡
-Hideaway in Kosovo
-Drinks in Ukraine
-Discover the history of Bosnia and Herzegovina
-Go skiing in Bulgaria
-Clubbing in Ibiza
-See the wildlife of the Tarrant Mountains in Slovakia
-Visit the Czech Republic with a loved one
-Krakow, Poland for the nightlife
-Berlin, Germany!!
-Go to the beach in Albania
-Get food in Leon, Spain
-Visit Antarctica in the summer

Go To Spots in Newport

If you live in California, going to Newport is a must. It's nearly sinful if you haven't been. Since I practically live in Newport for a few weeks in the year, I know first hand what a great getaway it is, and I wanted to share a few fantastic ideas for how to spend your time in Newport to make it the best it can be.
1.Go to the beach. Newport, Laguna, Corona Del Mar, it doesn't matter, all are perfect examples of the way to relax. As a plus, you're bound to get a sea life show! There's always dolphins, sharks, and even seals around to keep you interested. It's also a great place to find some sand crabs or sea shells or simply lay back and tan.
2.Another great spot to hit up in Newport is Rita's Italian Ice. I've already done a review on this establishment, but it's the perfect way to cool off after a day at the beach with some custard or cool ice.
3.Food, food, food! I also recommend Ruby's Shake Shack. It has an enormous selection of anything shakes. Yum, yum! A peanut butter shake is right up my alley.
4.Balboa Island is a great area to go shopping, get some food, and pamper yourself! If you end up strolling the streets there, it's absolutely mandatory to get a Balboa Bar or a chocolate covered frozen banana! If you're in the mood for really spoiling yourself, I suggest Sinfulicious. They carry bath bombs, scrubs, lotions, and you can even costumize your own bath bomb or scrub with any scent you please! My personal favorites are hazelnut, brown sugar, coconut, yuzu, and patchouli. It's like the lovechild of Lush and Bath and Body Works. If you're looking for a shopping spree, I really like Crush. I just bought an adorable and affordable jumper to wear. And if you're really wanting a sugar rush, Balboa Candy is the place to go! Theyve got the best selection of taffy candy that I've ever seen. Yum yum!
5.If you're stuck on where to stay in terms of hotel, I always stay at the Marriott. They've got a Koi Fish Pond, several pools and Jacuzzis, and even places where kids can hang out! There's also a great view of the ocean, some firepits, a sand volleyball court, and playgrounds. It's a great place to relax, hang out, walk around, and play. Plus, there's oodles of cute people.
6.The Fashion Island Mall is the best place to go on a shopping spree, to chill and hang out with friends, and to get energy out. I personally think all their shops have better selections of their items than the ones at home, like Lush, the pet shop (there were baby bunnies!!!), everything was much better in terms of variety and space.
7.See a theatre movie! I really love kicking back in the theatres that have the reclining seats and trays to put down your food. It makes you feel like royalty.
8.Eat out for breakfast! The best places to go are any crepe places (no surprise there for me), IHOP (pancakes are a no-brainer) and my personal favorite is this one restaurant inside an actual grocery store. It has the best potatoes, toast, and pancakes. Delicious!
I'm going to stop there, as the number "8" is my all-time lucky number. Hope if you ever chance going to Newport, you enjoy!

What They Dont Teach You In Sex Ed

Sex is more than just the typical,"this goes in that" definition that you're meant to know. No, it's more about, to me at least, about truly and really loving somebody that much, that you could perform such an intimate act with each other. It doesn't matter about the anatomy or whether you're straight, gay, or bi, or even trans. I think this is what they should teach in the classroom, not the rubbish technical stuff. For me, the emotional part of it really hits home. That's what really makes it special.

The Longest Ride: Movie Review

"The Longest Ride" is based on book by Nicholas Sparks. It's based around two couples romances, and it's very cute. I loved seeing the parallel universe between an elderly couple, and the current one between Sophia and Luke. I also loved the element of contemporary art that played into the plot. It was very refreshing. This movie is rated PG-13, though there is one particularly steamy scene that you might want to avoid with younger viewers. The love stories that play into the plot is about risk and sacrifice, though I must say that although it was a great way to pass the time, it was all too predictable throughout the entire movie, and so I give this movie a 4/5. It's anot entertaining story to watch unfold, yet I found myself calling everything, and I prefer hanging on to the very end for a shocking reveal or twist.

Self Harm

Lately I've been itching to hurt myself. I shouldn't feel like that on spring break, yet change always gets my anxiety through the roof. Even a good bubble bath, courtesy of a Brightside bubble bar, was only enough to keep me sane for an hour or so. And today I took a good look at myself in the mirror, my full physical self. And the scars are numerous, the scars that I prefer to call my map of intertwining tiger stripes. It's a gentler term, in my opinion. Here's the thing. Cutters face a lot of stigma if they choose to show their wounds freely. Most people will either run the other way or make fun, saying it's all for attention, all such rubbish and the like. My heart goes out to everybody struggling with self harm, bexcuse I know the pain and whenever I see somebody's "tiger stripes" as I would say, I just want to embrace them and never let go. But the majority of people's reactions just make things worse. But, on the other hand, I'm tired of hiding what I've gone through. I'm going to wear what I want, go swimming, live life as I please, and my scars, little angry dashes across my wrists, thighs, hips, breasts, it's not going to stop me. I'm proud that I didn't give up andinner that I didn't end my life, and screw everybody who's going to point and mock, or run off in fear. I'm happy with my life now and I may be currently in a rough patch, crying myself to sleep, but I'm in a much better position than I ever was before, and I have the confidence to kick butt now. I think it's time to bring more awareness about on self harming, because people need an education to understand. I'm gonna take it upon myself to help others get help and help others become more aware, and most of all, I'm gonna let it loose.

LUSH: Peeping Santa bubbleroon review

This morning was very trying for me. With all the pacling I had to do, it made me stressed to the max, to the point where I was almost ready to self harm once again. I decided that a nice bath would be the perfect solution! So, I broke out my Peeping Santa bubbleroon. Peeping Santa is described by Lush as a "cheeky, softening strawberry-scented Santa" that will help you to "get sleigh-loads of bubbles". Needless to say, I was very enthusiastic and had high expectations for this little guy based on his looks and smell alone. Peeping Santa is the cutest thing I've ever seen- he's got a red hat with a white tip and a nice flat bottom. He's in the shape of a Hershey Kiss and sandwiched in between the two slabs of red, is all the moisturizing butters you could think of, coupled with two vegan chocolate eyes to pull everything together. And the smell, too, blew me away. Peeping Santa has the best strawberry scent I've ever had the pleasure of smelling. It's a wholesome fruity type of aroma, similar to the likes of Strawberry Feels Forever massage bar, with a nice floral undertone. This bubbleroon conjures up images of strolling leisurely through strawberry patches, and it is absolutely scrumptious. Once put beneath the water, it was at first a little stubborn to crumble but after a few seconds of rubbing, it began to slide smoothly into the water. This bubbleroon can easily be used across three baths, and I used about a third for mine. Even just that much is enough, and in no way does the small amount take away from the experience. The water turned a lovely dark pink color, bordering on a shade of red. The bubbles rivaled even the likes of Brightside bubble bar, so silky smooth and enormous, nearly spilling over my bath onto the floor. From the moment I stepped into the tub, I could feel the butters at work, instantly making my skin soft and moisturized, the water around me like bathing in silk. The scent remained strong throughout my entire bath, and I was pleasantly surprised to find that once in the tub, the scent morphed into a deep and decadent strawberry milkshake aroma, and I was practically dying to take a taste of my bath water (something I would not recommend). The scent stayed with me after I'd exited and for hours to come. I was extremely impressed with this Lush product, and will definitely be purchasing an abundance of these asap. Rivaling the best of the best, Peeping Santa sweeps its competition across the floor and comes in with a strong 6/5 star rating, because it was just that amazing.

International Day of Happiness

Today is International Day of Happiness, and in fact, I am quite happy! Looking back into the past, though, it was rough. I was depressed, suicidal, my skin a dull pasty color, decorated with what I called my "tiger stripes" aka cuts. But, boy, things sure have changed. Sometimes I wish I was still miserable, but now, more than ever, I am ever so grateful for this opportunity I have to be happy, to be so joyous in everything I am, and everything I have. I am so happy that I have my family, my friends, food (yes, of course), my lovely home, that I'm educated, and I'm healthy, for my personality and my love of books and animals, for this very blog, for everything, really. Looking back on my post last year about today, I realize how amazing everything really is. Why not be happy? For today, at least, crack open a Dr. Pepper, take a sip, sit back, and smile. And if you can't do that, at least make others happy, make their lives just that little bit better, and I assure you, everything will start to look up.

A Creamy Sweet Treat: Rita's Italian Ice

I had my first taste of Rita's a few years back and ever since then, nothing else can compare. I haven't ever gone back. At Rita's, not only is the customer service and the general atmosphere great, but their custard is to die for! I highly recommend the vanilla custard. However, their main focus is their ice, and with the large variety of flavors, it's sure to be a hit. You can also get the custard and ice mixed, or together, and it truly is heaven on earth. 5/5 star rating! I'm glad I don't live too near to one, though, because I'd be getting some every day and by now, I'd be a pretty hefty sight to behold!

Sub Sandwich Places

I am a sucker for sub sandwiches. And today I just got back from a grueling workout at the gym and, hungry as ever, I decided it was high time to make a food review, because who doesn't love food, right? Anyways, when it comes to the holy sub sandwich, there are a few select places that I absolutely adore and are my go-to's for food. FIRST of all, the ever beloved Subway chain. This is the classic choice for most people in the mood for a sandwich, and what can I say? It really is a great choice. The six-inch sub is very affordable, but the foot long is great to have for two days of yummy munchies for lunch or dinner! You can also gobble up a fresh cookie for 75 cents. Or, you can get the kids meal, which comes with a bag of chips and a side. Subway's sandwiches are very healthy in comparison to other food chains in the area, like Wendy's or Five Guys. And THEN there's Togo's. Togo's is a great little place, and very similar to Subway. However, the subs have more calories, so if you're looking for the healthier option, I'd say go the way of Subway. But, in the very same shop across the counter, there's a Baskin Robbins, so you get a two-for-one deal! Ice cream and a sandwich, so that's nice. NEXT is Firehouse Subs. I think Firehouse Subs is the least known in comparison to the other two sub places, but in my opinion, they have the best quality sandwiches. Plus, their chip selection is greater and has more variety, and with the children's meal, you get a drink included! Not only that, but on Sundays the kids selection comes free, so that's a huge plus. I always, without a doubt, stay with the good ol' meatball sub, and Firehouse never disappoints! Although both Subway and Togo's are wholesome, tasty choice of sandwiches, if you're near a Firehouse Subs, you should definitely try it out and see what you think.

Lush Review: Dashing Santa Ballistic

After my last encounter with the Humpty Dumpty bath bomb, which was all too disappointing, I really wanted my next Lush product that I used to be a big hit. And I was not disappointed. Since I'm leaving for the beach tomorrow and will be residing there for the entire week of spring break, I decided I didn't have time to wait for my order to be delivered, and I certainly wasn't going to pay a hefty price of $36 for one day shipping off the Lush website! So I turned to Amazon. The prices off there are marked up, usually a few dollars more than the usual in-store cost, but I was willing to pay, especially since I have Amazon Prime and can get two-day shipping without a cost at all. I finally decided on the Secret Santa gift set, which includes Dashing Santa Ballistic and Peeping Santa bubbleroon for a total of only $13! I also ordered the Stardust bath bomb, as well as Father Christmas, so reviews on these will be coming later. Anyways, Dashing Santa ballistic- it's definitely worth the money. As soon as I received the box, I could smell it through all the packaging. Despite being a few months old, it was very strong. Dashing Santa is described by Lush as a, "...jolly satsuma-scented bath bomb." I'd say their description is spot-on. Brightside bubble bar, for comparison, has a very sickly sweet, straight-up orange scent, one of freshly squeezed mandarin oranges. However, Dashing Santa has a different kind of orangey, citrus scent, and it very much surprised and pleased me the first time I took a whiff. Packed with mandarin oil, bergamot, and orange flower absolute, it smells to me like a sweet orange, coupled with a floral note to it that was unexpected for me, but I absolutely fell in love with the scent. Today I had a tennis lesson and came home exhausted and drenched in sweat, and I decided on a little pick-me-up bath to keep my spirits and energy up. Dashing Santa stood out to me right away. This bath bomb has a cute, festive design. In the shape of a Santa in a running position, with a parcel in hand and his golden boots, I can imagine that this item could easily be cut and used across a few baths, which is a definite perk. However, I was feeling greedy today and was in no mood to cut anything short. Once placed in the hot water that had filled the tub, this cheery ballistic bobbed at the top and immediately began to spew out the most beautiful baby pink and some cherry reds, and the gold drifted off Santa into the water like liquid gold might. Despite the name, this product fizzes away at slow rate, and it finally melted all the way into oblivion after about 12 minutes. I was very pleased with this, as I'm more of a person for a nice long soak and a good show, and by no means short-lived. Upon it finally disappearing once and for all, the water was a lovely color. Although I've heard of so many dedicated Lushies claiming this ballistic turned the water a "period blood" color, I couldn't disagree more. The shade of my water, a nice, soft, peach color, reminded me right away of Raspberry Peach Snapple. And the smell remained just as strong as ever throughout the experience. Although this ballistic didn't leave my skin feeling particularly moisturized, I didn't want to leave the tub ever! And once I did grudgingly exit and drain the tub, I smelt of orange and orange flowers, leaving me as living proof of the best perfume ever made. I gladly give this Lush product a 5/5. With it's slow melt-away time, the wonderful show as it fizzes away that it puts on, the fantastic smell it gives off and clever design, it can't be beat.

Getting High

What, who ever heard of getting high on drugs? ...Well, whatever, who needs that? Me, I just get high on life. Those little moments, fun, excitement, it's the best natural high you could ever get. Trust me, drugs aren't real important. The real world is waiting...

Missing Mental Illness...

Sometimes I wish I was still in the worst of my depression, self harm, anxiety, all of it. Not really because I want to experience all the pain of that again. It's still here, but not as bad as it used to be and sometimes I think that maybe I would be a more interesting person, people would like me more if I were still really roughing it. I know it's not true. I used to be such a mess, and I could barely talk to somebody or leave my room! I wanted to die! I don't want to go back to that. It's painful and making me feel badly just thinking about it. It's hard to deal with the fact that I treated my own self so harshly through everything, so no, I don't want to live through that again. No, it's not going down. Been there, done that, check that off the list of everything bad and sucky. All I can say is, "screw it" I'm gonna do what I want, because I'm punk rock...just kidding, I'm totally not. I wish. But anyways, I'm happy, confident, and I kick butt, so what's there to really miss now? Yeah, that's right. I'm a rebel. You wish you were me.

Dalton Rapattoni

Damn. That's all I have to say. I love Dalton. I love his look, the way he sings, everything. And just...damn. Without a doubt, I would go to a concert of his, I'd buy every album he put out there. He is my jam. And tonight's episode of American Idol...man, I cried. I literally cried, and my mom and sister were looking at me like I was some strange new creature. I don't care what anybody thinks. I love whenever he sings anything, it always sounds great. When he sings, no matter what, it always makes me feel something, and that's what I love about music. And then there was that bit about having bipolar...that was when I really burst out the tissues, a carton of ice cream, and Adele lyrics, because I can kinda relate. With depression...I mean, I'm on medication and everything, but it's still hard, you know? Sometimes I just feel like a nobody. And I still self-harm sometimes. But there's always that cloud of sadness, always heavy on my chest, and I don't know, everything he said just hit home. And about the extremes...well, the sadness is already there, but then I was drinking "lean" to help cope and...that was where I got super energetic, wild, crazy, party animal, but I don't know, I stopped. I needed to face reality, and cough syrup and all that jazz just made it worse. Anyways, enough about my sob story. I just really love Dalton Rapattoni. I guess through everything he's said, everything he's sung, I feel as though I know him...crazy as it sounds, I know, but it's true. He's one of my favorite people and I don't even really know him personally. I support him all the way, and I hope he makes it far. I used to think being a nobody was an awful thing to be, that I was a failure. And now, I am proud to say that I'm a nobody. Much love <3

Easter Must-Haves

Easter is just around the corner, and in the true spirit of the holiday, I wanted to say a few things I absolutely must have at this time of year. First of all, the Cadbury Creme Eggs. Let's be honest, they're the best and I'm not embarrassed about the fact that I can gobble down twelve of the things before you can say "Ghirardelli" five times fast. Yes, I know. My parents must be so very proud. Second of all, I must have the Peeps. I am a proud addict. They're just so creamy and scrumptious, so what can I say? It's really a feat that I haven't found the time to buy my fair share of the sweet treat just yet this year. I also have to have Lush, but that's really a no-brainer for me. I mean, I must have Lush at all times of the year, but even more so of a supply once the holidays roll around. And nothing makes me happier than a couple of limited edition or discontinued bath bombs and bubble bars to snuggle up with in a luxurious bath. I know, I'm so cheesy. And then I also really appreciate a good book to have in hand, one of my favorites, of course, especially if I don't have the actual copy yet (a lot of my favorites are on the Kindle, though that's not my first choice of way of reading). Not only that, but I also really do adore my expansive collection of gel pens and stress-relief drawing books. It's very therapeutic, especially when paired with a good Lush bath product and a few creme eggs or Peeps. Right now, I'm in serious need of a new iPod, since my little rascal of a brother stole mine and hid it for all eternity, so an electronic device is always a nice addition to an Easter basket for your teen. It's also a nice thought to receive something that really speaks to you....for me, that would be anything that's shark-themed. I love sharks, and that may be an odd addition to anything Easter-related, but it's the perfect thing for me. And anything that has to do with seals, sea lions, penguins, and such wouldn't hurt either. I'm a softie for sea creatures. Ooooh, and stingrays. Definite plus. And gift cards are a nice surprise as well, and if it were me, I'd want an Ebay gift card (Lush!!!!), an actual Lush gift card, Starbucks, I don't know, something like that. But those are just a few of the ideas that really suit me, so hopefully it helps you guys pick something to pamper you or your teen child as well! Much love. xoxo

Spring Break Ideas

Spring break is upon us! Well, at least for me, anyways. So I decided it would be a fantastic idea to brainstorm some fun activities to do if you're spending the week at home and not on vacation (luckily, I'm going to the beach, but anyways...)
-Go to the beach
-Go to the mall
-Raid the 7-11 for their best snacks. Or go to your local grocery store for the huge tubs of ice cream. Pig out on junk food and sweet treats back at a friend's house and have a movie marathon
-Go to Mexico
-Go to Florida
-Go to Hawaii
-Go to Puerto Rico
-Go to Canada
-Go to a festival (for example, there's one near me coming up that's a pie festival...yum!)
-Learn origami
-Learn to cook
-Go to a concert
-Plant a garden
-Go hiking
-Have a picnic at a park
-Ride a bike
-Go horseback riding
-Fly a kite
-Climb a tree
-Feed ducks at a pond
-Bake cupcakes
-Buy and devour a package of Peeps and Cadbury Creme Eggs
-Get a bunny! No, seriously, roaming the pet shop is actually pretty exciting.
-Read a favorite book (my personal favorite is "Tiger's Curse", "Dear Killer", or a Shannen Crane Camp read)
-Camp in your backyard
-Go out to eat with friends!
-Take a wonderful bath (a few bath bombs, bubble bars, or bath melts wouldn't hurt!)
-Paint or decorate eggs
-Have a spa day, or a "me" day, and full-out pamper yourself- make some DIY foot scrubs, lip scrubs, face masks, etc.
-Dye your hair
-Do volunteer work! Maybe visit an elderly home and hand out homemade cards, do some kind of kind gesture for people to make them smile
-Organize your closet or bookshelf
-Do some brainteasers, like a crossword puzzle or some sudoku
-Do some yoga
And on that relaxing note, I need to head to bed. Night, everybody and much love ;)

What An Eating Disorder Really Is...

Eating disorders are plain hurtful. And, word to the wise, never buy into that "thinspiration" crap on social media. It just makes things worse. In fact, message those who are struggling with that occasional positive, loving, and kind message to let them know that you're thinking of them. It can be much appreciated. Anyways, take bulimia for example. Anything is and will be considered a binge. You'll feel weak for eating at all, and the only thing that relieves the guilt is purging. And even purging sucks to begin with. You'll be dehydrated and absolutely exhausted all the time, so beyond tired that you can't even sleep, a craving so strong for water but too afraid to gain a single ounce that it'll keep you up at night staring at the sink faucet, itching for a single drip. Your skin will become an unhealthy, crusty, rough leather. You'll throw up blood. The sides and roof of your mouth might bleed, and your fingers will be bruised from scraping against teeth. You'll throw up a little in your mouth if even the tiniest bit of food is consumed. Your period will stop altogether, out of the blue. You'll lose weight, sure, maybe thirty five pounds, but it's a roller coaster of numbers, ups and downs, from pound to pound. Your heart can become irregular, slower, or really fast with only a few paces on the carpet, and it might even just stop. It's scary. And recovery is even tougher, but you'll be glad and very appreciative to be happy once again, at peace with your beautiful existence. So linger at the mirror as long as you want to admire every little piece of you, because I will make it known, that you're completely and utterly worth it and beautiful, inside and out.

My Thoughts on Dating

Here's the thing for me. I'll chase after somebody, whether it be a guy or a girl, but if end up finding out that they don't like me in that way, then there's no reason to keep going after them. I mean, the way I see it, why waste your time on somebody who's not going to put the effort into spending time with you? It just holds you back from far greater things that you could be doing with your life. But, by all means, if you can maintain a friendship without pining after them, brownie points for you. ;) But if all they do is hurt you, then what's the point?

Humpty Dumpty Bath Bomb: Lush Review

I have been sick the last few days, and today I woke up feeling refreshed and so much healthier. Yesterday, though, I was miserable. To cheer my spirits, I went to Lush and picked out the Humpty Dumpty bath bomb. I needed a nice bath to keep me sane because being sick is literally my worst nightmare. Anyways, although it's described as smelling like orange, caramel, and bergamot, I picked up more of a scent like the Twilight bath bomb, which is my all-time favorite Lush product so far. This bath bomb comes for a hefty price of $8.95, but it's supposed to be reusable, good for up to three baths, so it seemed pretty justifiable. As soon as I got home, I started the water in the tub and tried to get open the bath bomb. I tried literally EVERYTHING to get it open. However, to no avail. I couldn't get it open at all. That was very displeasing for me, so, disappointed, I just plopped the entire thing into the bath. The scent remained strong throughout the entire bath, which I loved, and it spewed out lovely shades of yellow, green, blue, and pink. I was thinking it would take several minutes to fizz away. Since it smelled like Twilight to me at least, I guessed that it would be a spectacular and long-lasting sight to behold. However, the show lasted less than a minute! In the end, it turned the water a lovely dark ocean blue color, and after getting out I realized it really did give my skin a smooth feel to it, but I was extremely disappointed in its performance and longevity in the water and the fact that it would not budge open so that it could be used across three baths no matter how hard I tried. Overall, the scent was absolutely divine, but in all other aspects, the Humpty Dumpty bath bomb failed to please me. 2/5 stars for me. Hopefully I'll soon be able to return and pick up something that is more worth trying out, perhaps a Big Blue, Guardian of the Forest, a Mmmelting Marshmallow Moment luxury melt, an Ickle Baby Bot, another Twilight bath bomb, or a Rainbow Fun. Something that will actually be worth my hard-earned money. Because the Humpty Dumpty bath bomb definitely didn't do it for me.

Mystic Woodland Mud Pie: Homemade Bath Bomb

Tonight I was really looking for something comforting and relaxing. I was looking to spoil myself. And, considering the fact that I've run all out of my Lush supply stock, I deduced to get creative and make my own bath bomb. Here are the instructions on my "Mystic Woodland Mud Pie" bath bomb, and later I'll review how it performed compared to Lush's products:
Ingredients
-Peppermint oil
-Cocoa Powder
-Baking Soda
-Cinnamon, stick or powder
-Glitter
-Lemon juice
-Vanilla Extract
-Water
-Salt
-A few drops of any food coloring of your choice, especially green or a red, orange, or yellow color
-Coconut oil
-Bowl
-Spoon to mix together

First of all, I ended up mixing all the ingredients together, in no particular order. I was feeling a little risky. And, it really depends on the color you're looking for, what smells you want to dominant, and how fizzy or moisturizing you want it to be, so the measurements for each ingredient varies on your own individual wants. I didn't measure how much of each item I used, but it seemed to be just enough for a very enjoyable, yet different bath. After all the ingredients were in the bowl, I stirred everything together with a spoon. Make sure not to put too much water, otherwise it'll be too wet and won't stick together very well. Though I didn't use much water, my concoction had a thick, muddy consistence and coloring. However, I was not deterred. I put one small clump into my tub, filled with steaming hot water, and as soon as each hit the water, it burst into an explosion, like a mini colored tsunami. Once everything had been settled, the water was this murky green, hence the reason why I deduced to dub my bath bomb a "mystic woodland". A lovely luster lingers on the top of the water, shimmering and shining all gorgeously. I actually quite enjoyed the look of my homemade bath bomb once it had dissolved into the water. For me at least, it's a very calming color to behold, and especially with the lights off, it's like leaning back to relax in an undisturbed lagoon. As far as the smell goes, it's a mud pie. It's a delicious scent that every foodie would enjoy, one I have yet to encounter at my local Lush shop. Unsurprisingly, all the scents mix together rather nicely, smelling of a minty-chocolate-cinnamon pie with a hint of vanilla and coconut. It really is a lovely smell, like heavenly dessert that demands to be bathed in. Although my homemade bath bomb didn't turn out the way I thought it would in solid form, (although I must admit, I didn't feel like using a mold and letting it sit around all day to harden, so...) it was a breathtaking, as well as calming bathing experience. It really helps you to relax all the tension in your mind and body, and once you've grudgingly exited the bath tub, your skin is baby smooth. Although it does leave a slight glitter residue, I am extremely proud of my creation, and am glad to bestow upon it a 5/5 rating.

Daphne's California Greek Grill: Review

Today I went with my mom to try out a dining place we've been dying to try out for a little while now. I never really have had much interest in Greek food before, even though I would consider myself a rather adventurous person as far as food goes. But, I was willing to give Daphne's a shot. As soon as you walk in to order, it's a wonderful, friendly atmosphere to be in. After several minutes of contemplating, I decided on the Rustic Greek Flatbread. Although  it's on the Starter portion of the menu, it's more than enough to feed a single person. After my mother ordered a Mix-and-Match option, with the grilled chicken kabob, a salad, and rice, we headed to a table outside to dine. Our food was made speedily, and we had our plates served to us in less than ten minutes. The quick service definitely deserves brownie points in my mind. The Rustic Greek Flatbread is heavenly. Ingredients included on top are: tomatoes, cucumbers, tabouli, mozzarella, feta, green peppers, red onions, and kalamata olives. It was like a Greek version of an everything pizza. Delicious. I was pleasantly surprised that although it's flatbread and is very thin, even with all the other ingredients to top the meal off, it's a very filling meal and I'll definitely be getting this again. I also had a taste of my mom's dish. It was absolutely scrumptious as well. The grilled chicken kabob was seasoned well enough to my liking, and the rice was the best I'd ever tasted. Whatever they did to it, it was absolutely excellent. I also stole all her pita bread slices, which were divine as well. And not only is Daphne's delicious, it's also very affordable, healthy, and nutritious as well, so that you can go out for lunch or dinner guilt-free. Oh, and the plus is that if you get a drink along with your meal, they have flavor shots that can go with you drink! I got Dr. Pepper with vanilla flavor shot in it. But anyways, it was a fantastic eating experience. I'd highly recommend Daphne's for those of you who are looking to try something new, to explore something other than the age old, classic burger, along with the benefit of still eating something pretty healthy. 6/5 stars for me, because yes, that's just how much I loved it.

My Ethnicity/Culture Struggle

So here's the thing. I feel like any other culture, or ethnicity, has so much interesting background. I mean, in terms of dating, I'm a sucker for Indian, Latino, Middle Eastern, and some African individuals. That's just me, and I find that even just these groups of people have such fascinating stories behind who they are. And then there's white people, like me. I know I descend from people who were German, Swedish, Armenian, Russian, Greece, Switzerland, the like. But in the US, I feel like white people just get all their culture from other people's culture. And I just want to feel, for once, that white people actually have something to contribute to society, as for culture. I don't know. I mean, some have told me I'm a "Nazi". And that's just for the blue eyes, fair skin, and blonde-brown hair. Does that count? I'm not so sure it does. But anyways, I still do love who I am and perhaps someday I'll be able to visit Europe, pay homage to my ancestors. I love travel, and I especially look forward to going to Greece and Turkey. But anyways, I don't know, I guess I just think that the world is full of such beautiful people, inside and out. And that makes me happy, but also melancholy that I have nothing to contribute. I want to do something to change things for everybody, in the most positive way. So, whatever you look like, whatever your skin, whatever your culture, be proud of who you are, because I'm still learning to do the same. We can make this journey together. ;)

Anxiety: The Truth

Having anxiety is like drowning at all times, your head just below the churning, dark waters with no way of pushing your way up to the surface. The slightest change in anything can set you off, like an antelope leaping away to safety, away from the cheetah bounding after him. And your heart races, and you can't breathe, and there's tears and the ever-present fear of rejection, of failure, of anything really, that holds you back is something you never get used to. Anxiety can hinder you from meeting new people and tasking risks that could ultimately help you in life. It plain sucks to have to deal with every single day, but we're strong and we can kick anxiety's butt. Yeah, that's right. We can get through it together. Love anybody struggling right now. If I could, I would reach out and embrace you, but for now all I can say is virtual hugs for all!

JustServe.org

If you're looking to do some good in the world, if you're feeling like doing some service, then I definitely recommend JustServe.org! As soon as you sign up, it allows you to see all services that you can help out with in your general area. It's a great way to get involved with your community and to make others smile! 5/5 stars for me. There's something for everybody, from helping senior citizens, participating in blood drives, cleaning up land, making murals, helping in festivals, churches, volunteering at and schools, and, my personal favorite, giving back to people, like pregnant teens and women, and raising awareness about child abuse. I especially love helping children and young girls, anything to help and inspire. It's definitely a treat to see people's faces light up at all the good things you've done. I absolutely love it. ;) Oh, and for those of you who are in high school, it looks good on a college application, so that's always a plus.

Supporting Muslims

Right now, I just feel the need to stand up for Muslims. There's extremists in just about every single religion out there, so I feel that there is no need to generalize and oppress every single Muslim person out there. Not only that, but I don't get how people can reduce Muslims, especially Muslim women, into a piece of clothing, that they're only worth their hijab. Sure, they stand out for it. But that's what's considered modest for them, and I don't think it's a problem AT ALL to stand out. It truly is a great thing. Muslims are absolutely beautiful people, and every time I see one, I just want to go up to them and give them a huge bear hug. The Islam religion is beautiful as well, and I see no reason to disrespect someone for their religious beliefs and practices. Honestly, we might as well all join hands around the world and sing kumbaya. Why not? It could do a world of good for us all.

Distractions from your Depression!

Techniques That Have Helped Me:
-Exercise!!!
-Spend time in a social atmosphere
-Watch a funny show, movie, favorite video, etc.
-Cut out inspirational photos and quotes from magazines
-Make an "achievement box" of all the things you've done well to remember these accomplishments by
-go through old photos
-make art: paint, draw, use stamps
-Take a relaxing, warm bath, with a magazine and perhaps a Lush bath bomb or bubble bar (this is good for anxiety as well)
-Go to the library or a local coffee shop
-Talk to a friend for support
-Make a nice meal for yourself
-Spend time with a pet
-Play an instrument
-Do a crossword personal or (my personal favorite) Mad Libs!
-Listen to some upbeat, happy music and dance around your room
-Journal about what you're currently feeling to get it all out in the open
-Take a nap
-Organize your desk, shelf, or closet
-Do some volunteer work
-Sew, crochet, or make a quilt
-Cuddle with somebody :)
-Count and organize your money
-Read the book "How to Be Totally Miserable"

Book SNEAK PEAK

It's no secret that I'm absolutely ecstatic about writing this current book of mine. My aim is to write it about a girl struggling with mental issues, based off of real events that I have seen in lives around me.  Enjoy!
1. Ghosting away from the faded gaggle of chatty girls, the ones who never saw her. She seeped into the gray of the concrete, slugging along in the cracks, a statue of stone etched out of milky white bone. Crumbs made a trail after her, the entrails of chicken nugget bits and chocolate chips. She imagined she were a goddess, a bronze tiger brushing through the reeds. Tiger stripes, a map of angry red lines leading to nowhere. Her feet pressed upon the hot white tiles, all her secrets stored within  the haunted, echoing walls. A rusty mirror cracked at her ragged figure, stony eyes sunken in, an ever-prescent ghost of a smile about her thin, cracked lips. Red glowing beads peered into her head, thoughts threatening to break into two. She brushed a hand against the sinks, the water pooling at her feet, cloudy mists lingering in the musty old air. Fairy's dust sprinkled in the ground, a golden luster leading into a stall confining the the shouting and frantic numbers. Mechanical, glint of silver to her milk white pallor. Screw groaned as she bent over, her plain volcano face drowned by toilet water. A quartet of wriggling worms, eager to slide down her throat. Creamed corn, still warm as a hearth, launched a farewell dance into the air. Then, PLOP! flushed into the deep indigo oblivion. Color stained her fingers and mouth crimson with both guilt and pleasure. An angry red shriek sounded, and she waltzed out into the wilderness, slipping into a bubbly crowd of feigned innocence. Oh, Lenny.

Supporting the LGBTQA+ Community

So when I stepped onto the treadmill at the gym today, I turned on the small television that is in place before all the machines in the cardio room, and plugged in my earbuds. The station it turned to was the news, and they were discussing how both trans teenage girls and boys are being highly discriminated against in schools. And it got me to thinking.... And I just really would like to get myself out there and stand up for the LGBTQA+ community. I mean, schools are denying trans teenagers from being on sports team and fellow students are criticizing them for being in the same locker room. But that's denying basic human rights! And I think if this is what makes somebody happy, then you should be able to be whoever you want. Because what's the point of living life miserably? And self-esteem is so low for trans kids, all because of the trials they have to endure for being "different". A trans girl on the news program I was watching cut herself because of the tremendous pressure she was put through. You know, this is why the T.V. series "I Am Jazz" was so great. It promoted the idea that, hey, she's still la normal teen just like anybody else and gender identity doesn't matter. And, guys, imagine what life would be like if being LGBTQA+ was the norm, and being straight was stepping out of line. Honestly, if I could, I would change everything and make it all okay. *tear streaming down face* *hugs to the entire LGBTQA+ community* Lots of love. The way I see it, just because you may not believe in this sort of thing doesn't mean that you can't be nice.